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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Create what inspires you, and don't apologize for it.

There are a lot of solid strong men & women in front of the camera. We see that every day in our favorite films. They have to give to us a part of themselves, so vulnerable, so crafted, it’s fascinating to watch. But what about the women behind the camera? 

Before I started my journey into screenwriting, I always knew I loved writing. I remember sitting in my bff’s closet when we were twelve or so and just writing folders full of poetry. It was a harmless way to release the emotions we felt. At that time, I thought I wanted to be an actress. I didn’t know anything about women behind the camera

When I decided to go to college, I started taking film classes, but still didn’t know exactly what I wanted to do, or possess the confidence to entertain ideas about what I could do. I merely went. I learned. I loved every moment - the good and the bad. Because at that time, I had already lived a couple of lives. Corporate being one of them. And I KNEW there was no other place I’d RATHER be at that moment. :)

Since then, I’ve learned that I’d rather run down I35 naked than BE an actress and expose myself that way. I’m simply too private. I don’t think I’d want to reveal myself in the way actors must. I have great respect for actors and love them so, partly because I know this. When I write and others read, it’s bad enough. I always feel like I'm just sitting there butt naked. But smiling. 

So, here I am. I write screenplays and make indie films. Being a new director, I’m in love with strong successful women, particularly behind the camera, that are fearless enough to go for it, despite the extra challenges (if you're a woman in film, you know what I mean!). 

My role models are those (i.e. Kimberly Peirce, Adrienne Shelley, Nora Ephron, Kat Candler) who produce material that fuels their inner creative core.  It doesn't matter if it's an indie art house flick or a massive blockbuster. They make what they're inspired to make, and they don't apologize for it.  

I have way too much love and passion in my body that has to be released, shared, and this is how I choose to do it.  I love. I create. I write. I make indie films. And hopefully someone else, even for a brief moment, feels it too.

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